Thursday, September 27, 2007

I, me, moi.....

"That one last shot's a Permanent Vacation
And how high can you fly with broken wings?
Life's a journey not a destination
And I just can't tell just what tomorrow brings....."

So go the lyrics of the Aerosmith song 'Amazing' - the latter two lines sum up my own life. With each passing day, I think I know more about myself, the world and what lies within it. But then each passing day, i know less about it too. Each day brings new revelations, making me unlearn everything and start everything new.

And so it goes on and on to the point where you ask yourself, what is true and what isn't? What is for real, what isn't? What is permanent, what isn't? But what amazes me the most is the ability of people to change in a matter of seconds. One moment they are sweet talking - the very next, they're dripping venom or colder than ice.

I hate this aspect of being human, I hate this aspect of being selfish - not to say that I am not selfish at times. But I plain simple hate it - we'd do anything, just about anything for our own self - without giving a moment's thought to the affect it can have on others.

I don't know about others, but I have this massive inability to cope with such circumstances. I cannot react when it happens to me, and my reaction is extreme - either I'll cower in a corner or come out all guns blazing trying to take the other person on - trying to be one up!!

Both tactics fail invariably and I don't know what goes through the mind of the other person, but I end up being miserable - having spoilt my own day. Sometimes I wish I was a robot - devoid of any emotion. Sometimes I wish none of this would happen to me.... but then if wishes were horses, then pigs would fly

That last sentence makes no sense right? Life's like that..........




1 comment:

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